Ahhh... Christmas! Tis the season to be jolly. Tis the season to be giving! It certainly tis NOT the season to be in debt or wealthy.

Christmas marketing has gotten out of hand and every since I worked in the retail sector (2 years at Kmart / two years at the now non-existent BI-LO) I've never felt the same about Christmas. Both these companies are divisions of the EVIL corporation COLES!



There it is~ COLES HQ. Where the loving folk that run the place feel that any time it is okay to sack their loyal employees to improve the status of their shares.

This rant isn't about COLES though, it's about Christmas, the farce that it has become and the companies that insist on keeping this farce alive.

I love watching all the ads on television full of celebrities shopping in COLES and Woolworths with big smiles, all the stock freshly filled and all the customers dancing about whizz bang styles as if to be thinking "OH MY FUCKING GOD! THE ONLY REASON I'M ALIVE IS TO SHOP HEEEERE!! I LOOOOVE RETAIL!!!!! AIIIEEEEEEEE!" *visciously bites into a tomato with juice squirting everywhere and smashes it into side of head*

These ads are so fun to watch because it makes me wonder what fucking bizarre parallel dimension they were filmed in where all the stock is grade A, all the staff are happy to be alive and the customers are geuinely pleased with all this shop has to offer. The reality is Christmas destroys humanity.



Whilst working at Kmart I once saw a mature aged male push a pregnant woman out of the way to get to the checkout quicker. I've seen people arguing over the last item on a shelf. I've seen people push each other and squabble and stampede into the stores as soon as the roller door came up as if it were the fucking apocalypse and THEY MUST MAKE THEIR LIFE SAVING PURCHASES!

Why do we advertise, fuck, why do we PREACH non-stop about how giving and beautiful and wonderous Christmas is when it always turns into a free for all "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY" fist-fest that only puts our species to shame.

THESE ARE MATERIAL ITEMS PEOPLE! WE DON'T NEED TO BE SO FUCKING ANGRY! YOU'VE FORGOTTEN THE POINT! In my opinion, being tolerant and patient while shopping for those last minute items is showing alot more of the Christmas spirit than it ever would be giving a gift to a family member that you swooped in like a vulture and tore out of the hands of a screaming child to give to this family member. We are all kidding each other when we crap on about "giving, peace & harmony, jolly, etc." You know it's a harsh, greedy time of year, the world knows it's a dark time of year and the CORPORATIONS love that it's a greedy, harsh, dark time of year!

Speaking of corporations - don't you love it when they wish you a "Merry Christmas" via their multitudes of million dollar marketing mediums? I do, especially when everything they do is apparently driven by their need to know you're okay and doing well at this time of year. As if the CEO of, say, GE Finance, was just wondering;